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How to Break Bad Habits and Set Yourself Up For Success According to Research
“Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.” — Warren Buffet
You could be successful in any task you pursue only if bad habits don’t often interfere in the process. Eating healthy, being productive, producing quality outputs — they are all possible.
The only thing is that bad habits keep stealing your valuable energy. They attract you to give in to them. You try to resist them but most of the time, you succumb to them.
Habits are the brain’s way of helping us by establishing a pattern that neurons can follow. They put us on autopilot. They can be your servants or masters.
Most people choose the latter by fostering the bad ones. They devote more time in front of their smartphones or TV screens instead of doing their work. They stress out during submissions because they can’t break their procrastination. They struggle with weight and health because they can’t stop their bad eating habits.
They feel good when they do it but feel bad afterward. They promise to break the bad habit, but they cannot resist the temptation. They pledge to do it tomorrow until the idea disappears into the ether.
There is nothing to be embarrassed about when you have bad habits. Every person has. I know I have.
In the words of Benjamin Hardy, “If you cannot admit you have a problem, you’re not ready to make the change. If you still don’t believe you have a problem, then the negative consequences of your behavior haven’t become real enough for you. If you continue going against your gut, eventually things will become so chaotic.”
Being open to break bad habits puts you on the advantage against most people who deny them. You cannot change something if you can’t accept that something has to change.
Small, bad behaviors when piled up can have a negative impact in the long run. Your bad habits can create a dent in your productivity.
Many cannot accept that the results they are reaping today are the sum of what they repeatedly do. No wonder only a few benefit from the power of habits.
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It’s About Time to Bid Your Bad Habits Goodbye
“Fix your thoughts on what is true and good and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely, and dwell on the fine, good things in others.” — Philippians 4:8
Habits are difficult to change because they are already ingrained in your system. Doing things regularly condition your neurons to make the action automatic.
This is why your brain does not exert a conscious effort when you perform your morning regimen.
Bad habits are magnets that pull you away from your goals. They slow down your growth. Many people would like to stop them. Despite their best efforts, they are unable to change. Their habits take them to the direction they don’t want.
Bad habits are difficult to break because they make a person feel good.
Dr. Russell Poldrack said that pleasure-based habits are harder to break. The brain releases a chemical dopamine when it experiences an enjoyable behavior. He said:
“If you do something over and over, and dopamine is there when you’re doing it, that strengthens the habit even more. When you’re not doing those things, dopamine creates the craving to do it again.”
People have different habits, and so the way to break them differs from person to person.
It takes a lot of trial-and-error before you can nail what works for you. There is no one-size fits all formula that everyone can apply. Research shows sixty-six days is the average time for a person to form a habit. It varies from 18 to 254 days for it to stick.
Here are some science-backed ways that can help break your bad habits or at least minimize their existence:
Recognize the Loop That Impedes Your Progress
Whether devouring a pack of potato chips or procrastinating, you have one bad habit you want to bid goodbye.
Charles Duhigg shared the “habit loop” concept in his best-selling book, Power of Habits. He explained that habit consists of three parts: a routine, a reward, and a cue.
Once you identify each part, you can tailor ways to combat or replace those habits.
First is to pinpoint the behavior you want to change or your Routine. It’s when you get your phone and scroll social media feed instead of doing what you must. It’s when you take a long nap even though you need to finish something. It is when you grab a box of cookies when you have to eat salad instead.
This routine robs your time that can be devoted to tackling more important tasks. Recognizing the routine that impedes your improvement is a key to correcting it.
Next is to identify the Reward that you get from the routine. It is what makes you repeat the activity. It is the pleasure you get from doing it.
Duhigg said to test different hypotheses to find out what drives your craving. As you test, change some variables like the location, time or object involved in the habit.
After each experience, write three words that you can associate with the activity.
What makes you satisfied doing it?
Is it the salty taste from the chips? the crunch? the texture?
Is it the gossip from social media? the funny meme? the updates from friends?
Is it the quietness from your nap? the softness of the bed? the smell of the room?
Writing down the words can help you remember the thoughts involve in that experience. Once you have identified the reward, you can find another activity to replace it.
The Cue is what triggers the habitual behavior. Certain time, place, activity, emotion or people can trigger habits. Making a plan to avoid what triggers them can create a difference.
Many people want to stop eating unhealthy chips, yet, they cannot stop from buying them. You can develop a principle “out of sight, out of mind.” When you don’t see that craving, it is easier to ignore it. Limit your contact with it.
To find out the cue, Duhigg suggests writing five things when the urge hits.
To have a clear picture, identify the five categories: location, time, emotion, people and preceding action. Track down the activity for at least three days until you find the recurring pattern.
If your bad habit is being on your phone for a long time, study the cues involved.
Time: Is it there a certain time of the day you do it?
People: Are there people involved when you do it?
Emotion: Are you agitated or bored that prompt you to pick your phone?
Preceding Action: What did you do before you pick your phone? What action triggered you to pick it?
Location: Is there a part of the house where you always do it?
Once you identify your habit loop, brainstorm possible activities to replace that behavior. You can test by changing the cue that drives the habit.
How to Get Rid of Bad Habits Once and for All
Every single thing you are not satisfied with in your life is a result of a bad habit compounded over time.
If you don’t have enough money, it’s because bad habits kept you from taking action and making money.
If you are not as fit as you would like to be, it’s because of bad habits that kept you glued to the couch.
Bad habits are like viruses that spread into all areas of our lives.
Would you like to change that?
The only thing that separates successful people from failures are successful habits.
Whether you are training for an ultra marathon, starting a business or running a successful blog, cultivating good habits is the key to mastery.But this is easier said than done.
Most of us go through our entire lives under the control of external circumstances, as opposed to being at cause for creating the life we want to live.
We find it near impossible to build good habits because we spend every day floating down the river of life with no oars.
Empowering habits allow us to take charge of our destiny by controlling our daily activities so that we no longer have to be a victim to the roller coaster of our feelings. The compound effect of those actions over time leads to the life of our dreams.
Follow these 9 steps to transform success from uncertainty to inevitability.
1. Take 100% responsibility for your life
Our only true freedom is to choose our response and our attitude to the events that occur every day, especially when those events are outside of our control.
To practice 100% responsibility, choose to create an empowering meaning to any event, find the value in it and move forward in a manner that improves the quality of your life. This is as opposed to being a victim that blames, complains or whines about circumstances.
2. Define a compelling why
Without a strong reason to drive you in changing your habits, it is near impossible to do so. Viktor Frankl once said, “Those who have a why to live for, can bear with almost any how.”
I have adapted that to say “those who have a why to live for, will create almost any how.” The purpose behind your desire to change a habit is the fuel that will keep you going when things get tough. It is the driving force for change.
3. Believe in your ability to succeed
Henry Ford said it best, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.”
Belief is the root of change. The strongest force in human behavior is the need to act in line with our self-identity or our belief of who we are. To change a habit, you must believe that you can actually do it.
One way to create this belief is to log all the successes you have ever achieved in your life. From first learning how to tie your shoelace to graduating high school, whatever it may be, celebrate your successes to show yourself that you are capable of greatness.
Prove to yourself that you can do anything you put your mind to. Anchor in that state of unstoppable confidence and then condition the anchor over time.
4. Become aware of your habit cycle
MIT researchers have found that all habits consist of three elements: a cue, a routine and a reward. If you find yourself drinking a few beers every day after work and you want to change that habit, figure out how your actions fit into the habit cycle.
The cue could be coming home from work at 6:00pm. The routine may be taking off your shoes and your coat, sitting on your couch, kicking up your feet and opening up a beer. To figure out the reward…
5. Experiment with different routines that meet the same reward
Using the above example, the reward could be a variety of things. It may be the high from the alcohol, or it may be a release from the stress of work, or it may be relaxation. The key to breaking bad habits is to keep the cue and the reward the same, but change the routine.
To gain awareness on your individual habit cycle, write down your cues, routines and rewards while you are in the cycle. Then, experiment with different routines that offer the same reward. The reward may not be what you first think it is, so be sure to get very clear on the reward by writing it down every time you engage in the habit. Once you are clear on the pleasure from the behavior, then…
6. Interrupt the old patterns
Often our habits are so conditioned into our being that we move through those patterns without any thought or consciousness as to what we are doing. Interrupting the old patterns creates a space for new ones. A few ways to interrupt your pattern are to shock yourself or say something outrageous that makes you laugh or interrupt it through some physical action.
One woman put a can of dog food next to her fridge to interrupt her pattern every time she reached out for some junk food. The possibilities are limited only by your imagination. The goal is to get you out of a preprogrammed way of being by engaging in a behavior that shocks you, so as to change your state and facilitate the transition into another pattern.
7. Celebrate the little successes
No matter how small or large, celebrate every single victory. We are no different from Pavlov’s dogs; it is just as easy to condition an associated response to an event in human beings as it is in dogs.
By celebrating the little successes, we are simply conditioning the association between a positive emotion and the desired habit, thus reinforcing to our subconscious mind that this new habit equals pleasure. The emotion then starts to drive our actions, which in time leads to a new habit.
Success is a team sport. No one does it alone. That is why programs like AA are so successful in aiding the recovery of alcoholics. That is also why some of he most successful people in the world, from Henry Ford to Tony Robbins to Napoleon Hill, all created mastermind groups.
The reason why most people fail to change a bad habit is because they have no one holding them accountable for it. Find people to support you, or use stickk.com, and you will exponentially increase your chance for success.
9. Condition the new habit for at least 30 days
NASA researchers have found that it takes an uninterrupted period of 25-30 days for the brain to create a new neural pathway. In one experiment, NASA had a group of astronauts wear convex goggles that made everything appear upside down for 30 days. Much to their surprise, they found that after 25-30 days, all the astronauts started seeing the world the right way up, even with the goggles on. In a follow-up study, half the astronauts took off the goggles for one day after wearing them for 15 days in a row.
It then took another 25-30 days for their brains to form the neural pathway that made the world look the right way up again. To condition a habit for long-term success, practice the new habit for 30 days in a row without any interruptions. Focus on one habit at a time to reduce overwhelm and increase your chance for success.
Have you been able to create new habits that are still with you today?
We would love to hear your experiences with getting rid of bad habits in the comments below.
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We all want good daily habits. But instead we sleep in, check our email in bed, and have “just one more.” So, how do we start breaking bad habits and start making good daily habits? Isn’t there a simple three-step plan or a good habits list that will set me free? Not really. But there is hope—both practical and spiritual hope that you can have—and this article is full of both! Just like dominoes, there are lots of tiny, daily, doable steps that make a huge difference.
Here’s a tip. As you make your way through this post, pay attention to your feelings. If you feel defensive, make note of what you’re reading. If you feel hope, take note. If you feel hopeless, take note. We believe God is alive and still works in us today. Listen closely and He will give you exactly what you need.
One more tip . This is a longer post, but more importantly, breaking bad habits and making good daily habits is a lifelong process. Powering through this content in the next few minutes and never coming back might not help you too much. You may get to one part and need a few days to put it into action. Just bookmark this in your browser or save it to the home screen on your phone, and start working your way through.
Last tip. Here’s what you’ll find in this guide: some of the best books on habits, what the Bible says about habits, why you can’t just stop your bad habits, how to break bad habits, how to make good habits one step at a time, the importance of keystone habits , a good habits list , and of course we’ll answer the philosophical question, “What is a habit?”
What is a habit?
To find the meaning of habits, let’s think about what they do. Habits always serve some kind of biological, spiritual, or practical purpose.
You’re like, “Wait, what about picking your nose in traffic?” Well, even though it’s gross, the nose gets cleaned out and stress is mitigated. There is a purpose. A more positive example of a habit is brushing and flossing your teeth. There are many biological and practical benefits of brushing your teeth—like better smelling breath, healthier teeth, removing that clam chowder taste in your mouth, and lower dental bills. Charles Duhigg, author of The Power of Habit goes so far as to makes a case that flossing and brushing your teeth is one of five keystone habits that will radically alter your life for the better! By the way, if you’re into this habits thing, Charles has been a great inspiration on how habits work . We’ll get to keystone habits in a bit.
A habit is formed when you consistently meet an important need with a chosen behavior.
So what is a habit then? A habit is formed when you consistently meet an important need with a chosen behavior. Let’s break this down into an example of a good habit and a bad habit.
Bad habit example: picking your nose.
The important needs are mostly keeping your nose clean and calming nerves. The chosen behavior is inserting your finger into your nose. Do this consistently and you have a habit.
Good habit example: complimenting your spouse’s wardrobe.
Again, there are plenty of important needs like survival, the need to not sleep on the couch, and others, but let’s just say the need is to foster a loving relationship. The chosen behavior is finding kind words to describe the way your husband or wife chose to dress. Repeat this before work, on every date, or when they’re leaving the house, and you’ve got a good habit.
So, why are good habits hard to make?
There are many reasons bad habits are so hard to break and good habits are hard to make. Chemicals, biological processes, environmental contributors, and brain science studies can each explain some reasons. All of that is important—but let’s keep it simple. Habits are hard to break because, as we just learned above, they’re meeting an important need.
“An unhealthy identity creates unwise habits. Unwise habits reinforce an unhealthy identity.”
Even the worst of our habits are somehow in response to a real need in our lives. If you can get to the very root of a habit, you’ll often find an identity issue. Our pastor, Craig Groeschel, says, “An unhealthy identity creates unwise habits. Unwise habits reinforce an unhealthy identity.”
So what can we do about our habits? Instead of jumping into a bunch of “dos” we need to slow down and address the “who” issues. Maybe you haven’t fully forgiven someone. Maybe you have some long-term pain. Maybe you were terribly mistreated or abused. Maybe you were never taught certain things. Maybe you’re telling yourself you hate running, or you’ll always be addicted or overweight. Whatever it is, there’s a real identity battle that creates real needs in your life. Remember, even the bad habit you want to replace is somehow giving you a reward. It’s probably not a good reward, but it’s a reward. Because of this relationship between identity, need, habit, and reward, you can’t just stop a bad habit, you have to address the identity issues as you replace bad habits with good ones.
What does the Bible say about habits?
This short section has no chance at summing up what the Bible offers on this topic, but let’s look at five key themes you’ll find throughout the Bible.
- Isolation is a bad habit. Hebrews 10:24-25 makes it plain that neglecting to be part of a community of faith is not just the lack of a habit; it’s the presence of a habit. The original Greek word used for “habit” here is éthos which implies something that’s become a custom, that may even be prescribed by law. This lines up with the idea that habits serve a purpose—they’re a prescription for something. Good habits, like becoming a part of a faith community, are good medicine. Bad habits, like isolating ourselves when we’re struggling, only make us sicker.
And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. Hebrews 10:24-25 NIV
- Good daily habits are from God. Habits can be really good because the idea came from God. The very rhythm of God’s creation story in Genesis 1 and 2 is full of good daily habits. God followed healthy, life-giving patterns each day. Just in this one story, God illustrated habits of excellence, persistence, asking others for help (Adam named the animals; God said it isn’t good for man to be alone and created Eve), stopping to celebrate what you’ve accomplished (God saw that His work was good each day), and taking a day each week just to rest. As you read the Bible, continue looking for good habits throughout, and you’ll realize they’re a gift from God. Actually, 2 Timothy 1:7 spells out that it was God who gave us the gift of self-control.
… for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 TImothy 1:7 ESV
- Temptation isn’t from God. To the extent that good habits are from God, temptation that leads to bad habits is not from Him.
Whenever you feel tempted to do something bad, you should not say, “God is tempting me.” Evil cannot tempt God, and God himself does not tempt anyone. James 1:13 ERV
- Bad habits are bad masters. We tend to start bad habits out of a desire for personal freedom. We want to do whatever we want. If I want to roam the halls looking for something sweet, then I’m going to do it! But what happens? We end up with less freedom, mastered by sugar—or something else.
“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but I will not be mastered by anything. 1 Corinthians 6:12 NIV
- There is a way out. What Charles Duhigg refers to as the “habit loop” can feel endless and impossible to escape. We all know what it’s like to feel stuck in a habit, making the same mistakes over and over. It can feel like there’s no way out. But God provides a way out. This doesn’t mean you won’t have to do any work, but it does mean that He is good and worth following out of the habit loop.
No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. 1 Corinthians 10:13 NIV
What are some of the best books on Habits?
There a lot of really great books on this topic. Here are just a few of the best books on habits .
James Clear on the Craig Groeschel Leadership Podcast
In a recent episode of the Craig Groeschel Leadership Podcast, Pastor Craig had the pleasure of sitting down with James Clear, author of the best-selling book Atomic Habits, to get to the bottom of why habits matter and how they can come to shape our identities—and impact our leadership. If you’re a leader at home, work, or in any capacity you’ll want to give this episode a listen because when the leader gets better, the team gets better.
Okay, but how do I start good daily habits?
How do we make good habits? There’s not a one-size equation for making and breaking habits, but the most important variables are humility, honesty, and and asking for help. You’ll need humility to admit you can’t solve things on your own. You’ll need the honesty to tell God and others the depths of what you’re up against. Finally, you’re going to need to accept help from God, from others, and from guides like this. You can’t keep doing what you’re doing and expect good habits to magically form themselves. You’re going to have to accept and act on outside help. Speaking of help, there’s a lot of really helpful information and ideas in the books above, but here’s a simple acronym to help you get rid of bad habits and start good daily habits.
There’s not a one-size equation for making and breaking habits, but the most consistent variables are humility, honesty, and and asking for help.
H ealthy Identity
Many bad habits are there to cover or cope with something unhealthy in your identity. Porn addiction is not just about sexual need. Alcoholism, comfort eating, and even bingeing on entertainment is often a way to cope with something deeper. Constantly checking your phone is not just because there’s always super interesting information on your phone. As you begin to break a bad habit and replace it with a good one, it’s time also to open up about pain, confusion, or anger with people you trust. Let’s dig deep enough not only to replace the old habitual behavior, but also to address whatever identity issues the old habit was trying to solve or soothe. Pastor Craig Groeschel often says, “When you know who you are, you’ll know what to do.” It’s time to heal up open wounds by acknowledging them, forgiving, and believing what God says about us . But, you may not be able to see these wounds alone. Which leads us to the next step.
A sk for Help
You’ll have no problem keeping your bad habit on your own; breaking it is going to require others. Actually, trying to do stuff on your own is a habit worth breaking in and of itself! You might be able to knock out two habits in one. Ask some close friends, family, or even coworkers you trust to check in with you and ask you how you’re doing. Maybe you need to join a specific recovery support group, a LifeGroup , or get into a good church. A good rule of thumb is: The more personally destructive the habit, the more people you’ll need help from.
B e Kind to Yourself
Making good daily habits is not a perfection zone. On the day that you slip up, be kind to yourself. Don’t give into negative self-talk and self-hatred. Take this as an opportunity to dig a little deeper into whatever the bigger issue is. Spend some more time healing up and asking for help . Think of it as an opportunity for growth, deeper healing, and another chance to reinforce a good daily habit that stands up to all sorts of difficulty. Just like when you get a cold and your immune system gets stronger, this is an opportunity for the self-control that God gave you to grow and get stronger.
I nvestigate and Make Changes
This step is part of finding healing for your identity, but it takes it to another level. You may have thought you got to the bottom of your eating, spending, procrastinating, bingeing, or whatever. You identified the bad habits. You dug deeper to find some pain, started forgiving, began healing, and you developed a new habit to replace the old one. But maybe something still seems off. Maybe you feel like a joyless robot, just trying to get through life. Maybe you feel like you’ve only solved problems at the surface. Maybe the drinking stopped but you’ve gone to something else negative to cope. Maybe the old habit just won’t give and the new one just won’t set in. It’s time to investigate and make changes. Remember to keep being kind to yourself and asking for help through this process.
As you investigate, you might not have any changes to make just yet. Don’t change what’s working. Do keep repeating what is! Only make changes to your new habits that propel you toward health, growth, and a meaningful life connected to God and others.
T rust the God-Process
Habits tend to get a bad rap, but they’re actually a process God created. Let’s call them a God-process. You should trust that God is in the process of working something new and beautiful in your life as you discover healthy identity, ask for help, be kind to yourself, investigate, and trust His process. Processes like developing good daily habits are not something we make up to avoid needing God’s help—they exist because of His help. When we trust and obey God with our good daily habits they become God-processes. Without God’s help, all of our best efforts can become a self-salvation project—the worst kind of habit there is.
S mall Wins Every Day
“Small disciplines done consistently lead to big results over time.”
In his book Atomic Habits James Clear argues relentlessly for the power of small, daily wins. He challenges us to become one percent better each day. Pastor Craig says, “Small disciplines done consistently lead to big results over time.” If you want to run a marathon one day, create an identity goal to enjoy running and a small keystone habit of running at least one minute each day for the first week of your habit. Make your new habit easy and obvious. Allow yourself to grow in strength and discipline incrementally—one day at a time.
You mentioned Keystone habits—what are those?
The fastest way to comprehend keystone habits is to learn what a keystone is. If you’re in construction or architecture, you can fact-check our definition. A keystone is an architectural term for the wedge-shaped stone that would sit at the top and center of an arch of bricks or stones. Each stone in the arch pushes its weight toward the keystone. The triangular shape of the keystone’s wedge causes the entire arch to be supported. If you remove the keystone, the entire structure falls down . In biology, a keystone species is one that entire ecosystems depend on. Likewise, a keystone habit provides support for other habits . Here is a list of keystone habits to consider. What keystone habits do you already have in place? Which will you add? What keystone habits would you add to this list?
- Wake up with enough time to peacefully carry out your morning routine.
- Foster a morning routine that starts with prayer, meditation, and contemplating God’s Word.
- Sleep at least eight hours a night.
- Eliminate soda and follow the 8X8 water rule of drinking at least eight, eight-ounce glasses of water each day.
- Eat at least one meal together with your family or close friends each day.
- Attend a local church weekly, and participate by giving and serving there.
- Exercise at least three days a week for at least 20 minutes.
- Declare some truths about yourself every day.
- If you’re married, hold hands with your spouse every day.
- Verbally encourage at least one person every day.
How do I keep my new habits?
As we mentioned earlier, James Clear wrote Atomic Habits with an important premise. He suggests through research and example stories that habits, like the atoms that make up our world, are best when they’re small, incremental pieces that fit together into a healthy whole. So, instead of just deciding to stop drinking, or stop smoking, or whatever, James would suggest you create a series of very small but related habits that work together to reach your ultimate goal of quitting an addiction, losing weight, or using your phone less.
Okay, we get it. You can’t just stop old habits. You need new, incremental, meaningful habits to replace them. But how do I keep those new habits? Well, you’ve actually just read many of the answers to this question.
We need to realize what a habit actually is, and we need to decide which habits we want to change.
A habit is formed when you consistently meet an important need with a chosen behavior. Write your answers to these questions: What behaviors am I regularly choosing that I don’t want to choose anymore? What triggers those behaviors? What important needs am I trying to meet with those behaviors? What new habits do I want to replace those behaviors with?
We need to acknowledge unmet needs, and we need a healthy identity.
The more difficult the habit is to break, the more likely it’s tied to something deeper that needs healing. This is going to require humility, honesty, and hunger for change. Bring trusted people into your life. Talk to a counselor, a pastor, a healthy friend, and people you love about areas where you may need healing. Use tools like Words to Live By to invite God into these places so you can replace lies and negative self-talk with the truth of God’s Word.
Your new H.A.B.I.T.S will take time.
In addition to discovering h ealthy identity and a sking for help, you need to b e kind to yourself when you experience setbacks, i nvestigate whether or not your new habits are getting to the root of things, and t rust the processes and s mall wins that God is using to renew and reshape you over time.
Find a good companion Bible Plan and book as you get started.
Whether it’s one of the books we mentioned above, our new Habits Bible Plan , or something very specific to the habits you’re looking to make and break, you’re going to need some daily help and reminders. Bible Plans are awesome because they go everywhere your phone goes and keep you in the Bible. Books are helpful because they can take longer to finish and can become a long-term companion to your habit-making-and-breaking journey.
Identify which keystone habits you need to make or tweak.
You have habits that set you up either to succeed or to fail in your other habits. This is where good daily habits come in. Things like waking up with enough time for a healthy morning routine, reading the Bible daily, connecting with God through prayer, speaking the truth to yourself, exercising, and others.
We believe in you. There’s a God in heaven who loves you. And there are people around you who care about you.
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